WAIT A MINUTE...we thought it would be 7-11 months. We had no funds to travel again...yet. We were not ready. So, sadly we had to turn down this referral. I felt so horrible. I knew for a fact that someone would get this referral. It could have been the easiest 2nd adoption ever...too! I was emotionally sick for awhile after that. I kept thinking that it was a huge mistake that we made, but I tried to stay confident that our daughter was out there, and that was not our daughter in Tver.
4 months after we turned down that referral, we were informed that our agency lost accrediation and that a new accrediation process was taking place. Now, I really thought that we had made a huge mistake by passing up the Dec. referral. Trying to stay strong, and enjoy our son every single day, it became hard to go through even an hour without thinking about what was happening in Russia. I was constantly on line, looking at blogs, on-line info....etc.... Then, the ever so popular question kept coming up..."Don't you have your baby yet?". I literally couldn't go through one day without someone asking me about when we were going. OR...have you heard anything today? That was my favorite. It was ok though, I was thinking the same thing.
So, about 11 months after waiting, we get a telephone call from our agency. They asked if we would be interested in a blind referral. I asked my husband, because before, the blind referral thing scared us to death. He was 100% ready to go. GREAT.
Me too. The only information that we got was that the referral was for a baby girl around 12 months old. We didn't care what she looked like, we just wanted a baby with minor correctable conditions under 18 months. We were ready. With alittle paperwork updating we were ready to go.
So, the next weekend we set out for our 1st trip to Orenburg. Alittle nervous, we were calmed by our agency telling us that in the past, if something was wrong with the referral (sick child with major correctable conditions) they were always presented another baby that same day. We were also taking a doctor with us to check her out. That was another stressor kind of "out of the way". Leaving our son, with both grandmas, was the hardest thing that I have ever had to do in my life. BUT he was fine and excited for us to leave and come back SOON.
We hopped on our little flight to JFK, and then our big Aeroflot flight to Moscow, Russia. We ended up traveling with another couple that lived only 15 minutes away from us. That was really nice. When we arrived in Moscow, we were picked up and taken to our hotel in Moscow...the Marriott Grand.
A place very familiar to us from our first adoption. When we arrived, there was a Halloween celebration going on, it was kind of cool.
We got to our rooms and placed our items in there and headed down to the lobby to take a Tour of Moscow. It was an unbelieveable tour.
Well worth the $, since we split it with the other couple. Our translator/tour guide, Tonya, was amazing. We took tons of pictures and got to see beautiful sites that we didn't get to see on our 1st adoption trip. I knew in my mind the things that I wanted to do that I didn't get to do the first time, and we did many of them. We were not getting picked up until the next day, so we went back to the hotel, ordered room service (cheese pizza and choc.covered strawberries) and feel fast asleep. The next day, we shopped at Arabat Street and then had lunch at TGI Fridays. It was fun. When we got back to the hotel, we were met by our translator, and left to go to the Domodo..airport to fly to Orenburg. The ride was going the opposite way that we had gone on our other adoption, so the sights were definitely different this time. Once we got to the airport, we were met by our coordinator and he flew with us to Orenburg.
The flight was smooth and painless. They fed us the entire flight. :)
Once we got to Orenburg, we drove only about 10 minutes to our hotel. In the morning, we would go to the MOE for an interview and if they liked us, we could adopt.
Well, the MOE was a breeze. They liked us. So, off to the orphanage we went. It was a three hour 90mph car ride to Orenburg through the Ural Mountains.
When we got to the orphanage we were escorted to a separate little room and soon a caregiver came into the room with a tiny tiny tiny baby. Nearly only 12 pounds at 12 months of age. Initially, we held the baby and tried playing with her. They kept asking if we liked the baby and we said yes, but we had some health concerns and wanted to wait for our Dr. before making any decisions. Our Dr. didn't arrive for about 3 hours. It was a nightmare. We started noticing MAJOR health concerns. Arms that were bent and wouldn't straighten, legs that stuck out like the splits and wouldn't come together, clear infections all over the child's body, and facial features clearly of Asian descent, but they denied that she was of any Asian descent, so what was that.
I could feel the walls begin to close in and I began to get really really upset. When our doctor finally arrived to evaluate the child, she conducted some basic tests, all of which the baby failed. She looked at us and said that she didn't have a good feeling about this child. She went to the Orphanage Director's office and began to get other medical information that our interpreter left out. Her birth history was not good either. After talking to us, our coordinator called her into the hallway and loudly talked to her. About 10 minutes later all the people, interpreter, coordinator, and doctor walked into the room. Our doctor informed us that she thought that we should adopt the child because she was healthy. We looked at her in amazement. "What? What about all of the things that you have told us about her health." She still thought that she was a healthy child, so she said in front of the coordinator, that I feel pressured her in the first place. At that point we didn't know who to believe, but we knew that our gut told us that something wasn't right. Even the most obvious detail, her Asian descent, they were lying about. We went back to the hotel only to find out that they were not going to help us find another child. Our agency at home worked around the clock to try and find another referral for us and about 15 minutes before we were suppose to leave for Orenburg airport our agency came through with another "possible" referral. The agency couldn't tell us the health of the child, but they would know in a day or so. ONLY we had to stay in Orenburg and trust all of the people who just totally lied to us, to help us out. Our brains were mush and we just wanted to get home. We knew that this could mean that losing the referral, but we were too emotional to make any other major decisions and went home empty handed and completely heart broken. We only had one thing to grasp onto and cherish, the education and experience with our wonderful/easy first adoption. Thank GOD we had that to compare it to!
We arrived home and we were so emtional, but just glad to be with our son. The next morning we get a call from our agency. They have info. on another referral, in the exact same region that our son was adopted from. I was skeptical about Russia in general, but when our agency told us that they had medical and video, we felt alittle more comfortable.
Only, this little one was already 17 months, much older than we thought we were going to get, but once that video was on, we knew immediately that she was ours. I didn't want to get my hopes up, but she was so healthy and beautiful. She was recovering from surgery because Russia had done corrective surgery on her for a club foot. We felt that was a MINOR correctible condition, something we were very comfortable with.
2 weeks later we left for Russia yet again.
To complete this adoption, it was going to take us going to Russia 2 more times. BUT, it was all worth it in the end.:)
We knew that we were going to the Novgorod Region, but not until our van picked us up at 1:30 am to make the 8-9 hour drive did we know that we were going to Borovichi...the same EXACT orphanage in which my son is from. I couldn't believe it! That doesn't happen very often, hardly at all. So, already I felt comfortable because we knew the driver, coordinator, and kind of knew what this trip would be like. We rode with a couple who were going to be first time parents to a 10 month old baby boy. Our translator, Marsha, was sweet and very knowledgable. Natasha our coordinator, was wonderful, kind, and HONEST.
When we arrived, almost at sunrise, about 9am, I couldn't believe that I was in the same place again.
About 20 minutes before we arrived I started seeing sights that I remembered on our adoption trip 3.5 years ago. It was the most surreal feeling in the entire world. Chills ran up my spine as we entered the gate up to the orphanage. We were back.
The smells were the same. My memories of a place that I never thought I would visit again, were right in front of me. After entering the office, the Orphanage director immediately remembered us and we were able to share many pictures of our son to her and she, in turn, showed them to many caregivers. There were some tears of joy. Off they sent us, to meet our daughter.
As we walked down the hall, right behind us was a lady, the same lady that we first saw our son with, holding our daughter walking behind us. Can you believe that!
She was in a hat, and a red dress with a doggy on the front with a cream sweater and red tights. (and a little cast on her little foot) Intitially she began to cry out of fear, and she was pretty much shy and reserve the entire visit. Only after she got some food in her belly did we see a smile.
BUT she blew us kisses and down she went for a nap. We went back to the office and learned of her medical history, which was almost perfect, except for the club foot, so we signed and got the paperwork rolling.
That was it for that trip.
Back to the airport, and home again. 4 days total. We were wiped out!
4 weeks later we were back in Russia for the 3rd and final trip. We visited our daughter before court and she was, again, very shy, but warmed up to us alittle more.
We drove to Novgorod for court and they, too, remembered us. So, it was easy. They saw how good our son was doing and BOOM, done. We were parents again!
The pick up of our daughter, was again, on the side of the road.
She was a perfect angel on the ride back to Moscow (in her too cute VERY pink snowsuit). I don't think she cried once. Once we were in Moscow, she fell right to sleep AND once again I began to get sicker and sicker and sicker. YUCK!! The embassy and doctor visit are a total blurr. She only wanted me, not daddy yet, and I was so, so, so sick. We did make it though. She was really a great baby and transitioned very well. When our flight left Moscow, I began to feel better and we finally arrived to JFK only to find out that our flight home had been cancelled. We had to spend the night in New York and our luggage was??? So depressing. I think that my husband and I truly lost brain cells. The next morning we had to drive to Lagurdia and catch a flight to Atlanta, home. We made it home on Christmas Eve. We were happy, but exhausted.
What a story. It's so special to have that wonderful bond between our children. They are both from Borovichi. Borovichi is near and dear to my heart.
